Rising Above The Crab Mentality of Others
Do people around you love to criticize whatever work you do even for the smallest things? Also, do you sense that they keep on backfighting and talking nasty things behind your back? Let me sum it up, it is crab mentality.
According to Wikipedia,
Crab mentality, sometimes referred to as crabs in the bucket, describes a way of thinking best described by the phrase “if I can’t have it, neither can you.” The metaphor refers to a pot of crabs. Individually, the crabs could easily escape from the pot, but instead, they grab at each other in a useless “king of the hill” competition (or sabotage) which prevents any from escaping and ensures their collective demise. The analogy in human behavior is that of a group that will attempt to “pull down” (negate or diminish the importance of) any member who achieves success beyond the others, out of envy, conspiracy or competitive feelings.
Your reputation and everything you have worked for, especially when talking about work environment, can be very stressful if you are a victim of crab mentality. First thing that would come into your mind is, “Why me?”
It could be that there is nothing wrong with you. As a matter of fact, positively thinking, you have good characteristics which brings insecurity to others. Nevertheless, do not feel pressured just in case anxiety and stress attack because of this. I would recommend you do the following:
Staying away from bad vibes, bad people.
People around you may put you down for whatever reason so they can put themselves up. Create a new circle of people that brings a multitude of colorful fountain that will help hoist your spirits up. If you stay with negative-thinking people, the tendency is, you will just be sunk in their holes.
Talk with someone.
Never keep it to yourself. Pick someone from your friends or relatives whom you trust most. Tell things what your heart cries out. It may lead to depression if you do not share your feelings when anxiety builds up.
Also, you can write a blog, in which I am doing. Rant it all out, just make sure that you are aware of whatever you write online.
One thing I learned during my spiritual retreat is to find a place where you can think, just by yourself or with someone who is very close to you. Write whatever you wanted to say on a piece of paper. Say a little prayer and burn it to ashes. This will definitely help you in relieving the stress that brings when someone puts you down constantly.
Do not be disheartened by these people. Find new activities outside of work that can help you forget things temporarily. Join a gym club or continue your hobby. By this, it will help you not to keep thinking what could you have done wrong or how to put up a revenge.
Stay optimistic and be nice.
Apply the golden rule. Sometimes, it is not bad to believe in karma. Attract positive vibes from the universe and for sure, she will give it you.
Never lose confidence with yourself especially when presented with tons of negativity around you. You can always counteract with subliminal messages and fill your mind, heart and spirit with positive thoughts each day you breathe. Whenever you are feeling sullen, repeat this simple subliminal messages:
I am the author of my life.
I know that I am a good person.
I am self-reliant and very strong.
I have a wall that keeps negative people away from me.