Pardon for this post as I am using my mobile phone to write my thoughts. Yes, it’s so urgent that I could not wait to come home and write on a proper and more convenient platform.
When did you feel so down and depressed? This is totally different from your usual quarter-life crisis. I’ve undergone that phase in my life and I managed to succumb. Quarter-life is when you don’t feel contented or have no sense of accomplishments with what you have achieved so far in the past two decades of your existence on earth. Despite the fact that you may have graduated from university and earning a degree or for some, masters; yet, at your age, you have not acquired the things you desire for – that is what I felt during my crisis. Although I have undergone identity crisis, too, but that’s another story.
Here I am at the gym, inside the men’s locker room with my wet towels around my waist and sitting in one of the benches after a low-quality workout a few minutes ago. I kept on recollecting things that have happened in the past. I wonder how do people cope up with depression: long sleeps; no appetite or very low appetite; sugary food cravings; exhaustion; low-self esteem; and all that non-glittery jazz of life. Not considering that some have to take stimulants or drug to combat depression, aside from 5-htp, which thankfully is not available where I’m now… whatelse?
And guess what, two Chinese men just started to entertain me because they noticed I am not smiling. Entertainment per se of talking and conversing about the Filipino culture and language. I abruptly lost my train of thought there. Going back…
I am fully aware of the consequences of the wild things I have been doing these past few weeks and it is taking its toll, short-term effects. If you are close to me, you might have an idea what I am going through right now. I would not blame anyone nor my personality of being curious, too observant and dynamic yet it left me somewhere in a hole where it is hard to get out of. Well, The Big Bang Theory is actually a quick work around although this toothache is totally killing me.
If you have any thoughts apart from the obvious solution, chat with me. Free coffee perhaps?